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Crapps Episode Two: Sexy Time

Crapps takes a long, hard look at some of the most terrible erotic apps on the App Store, including the most irritating virtual girlfriend ever conceived and a sure-fire method to (never) sleep with another human being.

Boob Facts

Dozens of interesting and educational tit-bits all about breasts, that you’ll never read because the app always seems to crash on the first screen.


Does what it says on the tin. Adds ‘jiggle spots’ to any photo in your collection, for rather dubious purposes.

Sexy Girlfriend

Bag yourself your very own pretend girlfriend, right there on your iPhone. Includes fantastic features, such as constant pop-up ads and graphics that would’ve looked out of date on a ZX Spectrum.

Super Sexy Pick Up Lines

Want to pick up a real-life human in your drinking hole of choice? Then don’t bother to install this app, which features such classic lines as ‘are you an alien? Because you just abducted my heart’. *Voms*


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